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BatSheva (BatSheva Vaknin) – Living With Kids – the BLOG

Obviously this topic could take up as much room as an encyclopedia, so let me just address one or two tiny yet oh so irritating (albeit cute, in a gross way) differences in life once kids appear on the scene.

1. Boogers.

Found one today after I stepped out of the shower, slimed across my big toe. Apparently, one of my little whippersnappers had found my clean towel that had been hanging from the bathroom door a more appealing home for his/her booger than a tissue. And I, unwittingly, had swiped said booger across my toe during the habitual process of drying myself as I stepped out of the shower.

At least it was just my toe.

2. Pee pee.

It’s one thing to clean it off the floor after a kid has an “accident” (though that too runs my patience thin when it’s the third time that day and of a consecutive run of over one week of said “accidents”)… But it’s quite another thing to plop innocently down on the porcelain throne, our toilet, ready to do my business… only to feel that oh so unwelcome slippery wetness attach itself to my under-thigh. Someone’s pee pee.
Was it my son, who perpetually “forgets” to lift the seat to pee? Was it my daughter, who likes to slide forward on the seat in order to grab the toilet paper & wipe herself, smearing pee pee on the seat in the process?

It occurs to me I need to buy those commercial seat covers for my own damn bathroom. Because as bad as it is for me, I’m still their mom, they came out of me after peeing inside my stomach for 9 months, so after all, what harm’s a little of their pee pee going to really do to the back of my leg?

But for my house guests? Oh, my poor, innocent, unsuspecting guests.

c/xo

Sheva (BatSheva Vaknin)

They look so innocent... and then come the boogers.