Blogging. Reality “TV” for those of us who can’t get a Kardashian deal?
I hate to think that. I prefer to think of myself as a would-be writer who uses blogging as a creative outlet.
But let’s get real.
It’s not exactly as if I’m writing tomes on Shakespeare, or even gossiping about fashion or celebrities. (Well, sometimes I am. But that’s different.)
I’m writing about ME. My life. My thoughts. And while I actually love to read other writers who write about their personal lives (engaging ones, anyway, like Sedaris, Tina Fey and Sarah Silverman, and the 30+ other authors of memoirs I’ve poured through), and I love to write about things ‘close to home’ (duh, ME), it IS a little disconcerting to realize that people I don’t know, or what’s actually even worse, people I DO know but don’t know that WELL, now know me… very well.
They know, for example, that I’m a bad cook. That I hate to clean. That I’m low on dough. That I’ve been on diets that have worked, and diets that haven’t. That I am a Jew who celebrates Christmas. That I changed my name. That I put safety pins in my bras to make them last longer. I’ve written about losing my virginity, for crying out loud!
[BTW - SO annoying that some of my old blogs have disappeared & MOST of the pictures/videos from my older blogs have disappeared. But since I'm as techno-stupid as they get when it comes to 'computers' - other than tapping on their keyboards to make pretty stories - I have little choice but to cringe and move on...]
So, anyway, occasionally, when I’m out and about and I run into someone whose name I don’t remember but whose face I’ve seen around, and that person gives me that knowing smile and eye-crinkle, I can only assume it is likely that he/she has read my blog.
Conundrum: I WANT more & more people to read my blog. I apparently suffer from a bit of a “Kim Kardashian Complex,” AKA I’m happy to put my private self in the public eye. (NO sex tapes, thank GOD – coming of age sexually during a pre-cell-phone video/YouTube age has its advantages!) And yet…
I feel pretty vulnerable when people give me that look.
Ok, readers: eyes averted, from now on!
Just kidding. Read, enjoy, look away. I’ve asked for it, and I’ve gotten it.
Sheva (BatSheva Vaknin)