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Reality Me

posted by BatSheva Vaknin @ 10:42 AM
Monday, May 7, 2012

Blogging. Reality “TV” for those of us who can’t get a Kardashian deal?

I hate to think that. I prefer to think of myself as a would-be writer who uses blogging as a creative outlet.

But let’s get real.

It’s not exactly as if I’m writing tomes on Shakespeare, or even gossiping about fashion or celebrities. (Well, sometimes I am. But that’s different.)

I’m writing about ME. My life. My thoughts. And while I actually love to read other writers who write about their personal lives (engaging ones, anyway, like Sedaris, Tina Fey and Sarah Silverman, and the 30+ other authors of memoirs I’ve poured through), and I love to write about things ‘close to home’ (duh, ME), it IS a little disconcerting to realize that people I don’t know, or what’s actually even worse, people I DO know but don’t know that WELL, now know me… very well.

They know, for example, that I’m a bad cook. That I hate to clean. That I’m low on dough. That I’ve been on diets that have worked, and diets that haven’t. That I am a Jew who celebrates Christmas. That I changed my name. That I put safety pins in my bras to make them last longer. I’ve written about losing my virginity, for crying out loud!

[BTW - SO annoying that some of my old blogs have disappeared & MOST of the pictures/videos from my older blogs have disappeared. But since I'm as techno-stupid as they get when it comes to 'computers' - other than tapping on their keyboards to make pretty stories - I have little choice but to cringe and move on...]

So, anyway, occasionally, when I’m out and about and I run into someone whose name I don’t remember but whose face I’ve seen around, and that person gives me that knowing smile and eye-crinkle, I can only assume it is likely that he/she has read my blog.

Hmmmmm…..

Conundrum: I WANT more & more people to read my blog. I apparently suffer from a bit of a “Kim Kardashian Complex,” AKA I’m happy to put my private self in the public eye. (NO sex tapes, thank GOD – coming of age sexually during a pre-cell-phone video/YouTube age has its advantages!) And yet…

I feel pretty vulnerable when people give me that look.

Ok, readers: eyes averted, from now on!

Just kidding. Read, enjoy, look away. I’ve asked for it, and I’ve gotten it.

Toyota.

(couldn’t resist)

c/xo,

Sheva (BatSheva Vaknin)

Me, in front of one of those PR party-sponsorship boards, pretending to be on the red carpet. When in reality, my friend and I had snuck over after the celebrities had already entered in order to snap photos of each other.

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